Salad bars in funeral homes

"While you're waiting, help yourself to our bountiful salad bar. You'll love our house dressing."

Non-alcoholic vodka

"Moscow nights were never lovelier, AND SAFER!"

Outlet stores at nuclear power plants

"The Nuke Store, open now at Sea View Nuclear Station! For all your nuclear power needs, at up to half the price. We've got T-shirts, mugs and postcards, too."

Translucent bathing suits

"Modesty, but without the tan lines."

Caffeinated baby food

"Bored with your baby? Does he sleep too much? Try BABY AWAKE! formula and baby food. Each serving size contains as much caffeine as a cup of brewed coffee. Baby will want to play all day. And all night, too!"  

Four-sided Rubik's Cube

"Stumped by the Rubiks' Cube? Try CUBE 4, the cube puzzle for beginners. It's got only four sides, so you won't be stumped for long. Master this, and you'll be ready to take on the real thing!"

Bubble gum for dogs

Here it is, finally! Surprise your pooch with Bubble Pup, the new bubble gum for dogs. Teach him or her to blow bubbles. Only takes weeks.* Just follow our easy-to-understand instructions. Amaze your friends and family. Comes in three doggy-pleasing flavors: liver, hamburger and chicken.                                                                                                                              *Results not typical